Untitled #26 (Gen, PG)
Apr. 29th, 2009 11:29 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pixel_0Title: Untitled #26
Rating: PG
Category: Gen oneshot
Word Count: 1060
Characters: Dean and Castiel
Spoilers: None
Summary: Dean shops and Castiel observes.
Author’s Notes: From here. For![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
astrothsknot who asked for something where Dean goes shopping. Castiel comes too. Dean resists the urge to kill him.
Disclaimer: The following characters and situations are used without permission of the creators, owners, and further affiliates of the television show, Supernatural, to whom they rightly belong. I claim only what is mine, and I make no money off what is theirs.
- - - - -
Dean found him at the end of the bath products aisle with a bright pink bottle in his hand. Dean groaned and rolled his eyes. Of all places for the angel to show up...
"What are you doing here?" Dean asked. Then, with a glance at the strawberry scented body wash, he added, "And with that?"
Castiel looked up from where he was reading the label on the back of the bottle. "It seems I was reading about how to 'infuse myself with the power of strawberries,'" he replied. "I was not aware that strawberries provided one with such a gift."
"Yeah, well? They usually don't, but when they're all liquid like in a bottle, they sure do wonders," Dean replied with a roll of his eyes.
Castiel placed the bottle back on the shelf and followed Dean as he turned down another aisle. "What are you shopping for, Dean?" he asked.
"The usual," Dean said. He stopped long enough to grab a new pack of blades for his razor. Next to him, Castiel had picked up a bottle of shaving cream and was turning it over in his hands.
"What are you doing?" Dean asked.
"Observing. I have received orders that I am to observe more about the human world."
"So you pick me."
"Is there someone else you suggest I should watch?"
Dean was about to spit out something smartass like Paris Hilton would probably appreciate a guardian angel on her shoulder, but he thought better of it. Knowing Castiel, Dean would have to give him a play-by-play explanation on who, exactly, was Paris Hilton and why she should have an angel with her. Instead, Dean exhaled and shook his head. "Whatever."
"This is cream," Castiel said as Dean began to walk away.
Dean stopped and turned around. "What?"
"Cream," Castiel said, holding up the blue can of shaving cream. "Cream is something that is normally used in desserts, isn't it? Odd that you would want to shave with it."
"It's a different kind of cream. Not edible."
"But cream is cream. All the same."
Dean sighed. "Do you speak English, man?"
"Yes, I speak English," Castiel answered, tipping his head to the side in that inquisitive manner he had adapted. "Do you not feel that I speak English adequately enough?"
"Well, just..." Dean put his hands on his hips, the handle of the shopping basket hanging off his wrist. Castiel was so much more annoying in a normal environment where they weren't out in old abandoned barns, fighting down demons. Put him in the middle of a store, and he just became a complete pain in the ass. "Look. Shaving cream is not edible. Whipped cream is edible. They're not the same thing. The end."
"I sense that you are growing agitated with me."
"You sense right," Dean said as he walked away. He still needed some groceries for them--he and Sam, who was back in the motel doing research. Hopefully, though, if Dean ventured into the grocery section, Castiel wouldn't end up trying to talk to the vegetables.
"Now, you need to buy food," Castiel said, moving with Dean down the aisles.
"Yup." Dean grabbed a bag of chips and dropped them in the shopping basket. The chips wouldn't last long between Sam and him, but they'd taste good anyway for their brief life.
"You choose unhealthy foods."
"What?"
"These are unhealthy," Castiel said. He had a bag of chips--the one Dean had just chosen--in one hand and a low-fat bag in the other hand. He was glancing back and forth between the nutritional labels. "The bag that you have chosen is higher in fat, calories, and sodium. It seems that the healthier choice would be the other brand."
Dean stared, flabbergasted. "And I care about that why?" he finally managed to sputter.
"Keeping one's body healthy should be a top concern. At least that seems to be what the magazines at the front counter were telling me. I would have assumed you would be following a similar healthy lifestyle."
"Cas?"
"Yes?"
Dean exhaled. His nerves were starting to fray. "Cas," he repeated again, trying to keep his voice level, "in case you haven't noticed, there's the whole 'been to Hell and back' thing I've got going on. And then there's, oh yeah, the apocalypse on our asses? Worrying about how many goddamn calories I'm eating is not exactly on my list of priorities. Not in the top ten. Not in the top hundred. Probably not even in the top one thousand, gottit?"
"So you do not pick your foods by nutritional value?"
Dean's answer was a curse under his breath.
Castiel nodded as if this made perfect sense, and he placed the two bags of chips back on the shelf.
Dean was halfway down the aisle, heading towards the beef jerky when Castiel asked, "Do you have a preference to your foods?"
Dean stopped and turned around. "What?"
"A preference? I am curious to know which foods appeal to you."
"And why's that?"
"I believe I already told you that. I am observing human nature. Food is a very large part of a person's life. I assume it would be for you, as well."
"Y'know, Cas, if you want to go and observe somebody, why don't you go observe Sam, hm? He's always up for some psycho-babble-bullshit and intellectual mumbo-jumbo, all right?"
"But Sam is not here. Sam is back at the motel room where he is working on his computer. I have already observed the both of you in that environment. I want to observe here."
"Well, if you're going to observe, can you at least observe quietly? I'd like to have a moment in my life where you're not breathing down my neck." Dean reached over and dropped a couple bags of jerky into his shopping basket.
"Dean?"
He sighed. "What?"
"Jerky. I know you have accused me before of not understanding the English language, but 'jerky'--and its other forms of ‘jerk’--is a word that has more than one meaning, does it not?"
"Oh God..." Dean groaned.
"Well, yes," Castiel said, "I am sure God would understand the origin of the word 'jerk,' but I feel that bothering Him with such trivial matters is not appropriate."
Dean shook his head and walked away. Stupid angels. Stupid, stupid angels.
End
Rating: PG
Category: Gen oneshot
Word Count: 1060
Characters: Dean and Castiel
Spoilers: None
Summary: Dean shops and Castiel observes.
Author’s Notes: From here. For
astrothsknot who asked for something where Dean goes shopping. Castiel comes too. Dean resists the urge to kill him.Disclaimer: The following characters and situations are used without permission of the creators, owners, and further affiliates of the television show, Supernatural, to whom they rightly belong. I claim only what is mine, and I make no money off what is theirs.
Dean found him at the end of the bath products aisle with a bright pink bottle in his hand. Dean groaned and rolled his eyes. Of all places for the angel to show up...
"What are you doing here?" Dean asked. Then, with a glance at the strawberry scented body wash, he added, "And with that?"
Castiel looked up from where he was reading the label on the back of the bottle. "It seems I was reading about how to 'infuse myself with the power of strawberries,'" he replied. "I was not aware that strawberries provided one with such a gift."
"Yeah, well? They usually don't, but when they're all liquid like in a bottle, they sure do wonders," Dean replied with a roll of his eyes.
Castiel placed the bottle back on the shelf and followed Dean as he turned down another aisle. "What are you shopping for, Dean?" he asked.
"The usual," Dean said. He stopped long enough to grab a new pack of blades for his razor. Next to him, Castiel had picked up a bottle of shaving cream and was turning it over in his hands.
"What are you doing?" Dean asked.
"Observing. I have received orders that I am to observe more about the human world."
"So you pick me."
"Is there someone else you suggest I should watch?"
Dean was about to spit out something smartass like Paris Hilton would probably appreciate a guardian angel on her shoulder, but he thought better of it. Knowing Castiel, Dean would have to give him a play-by-play explanation on who, exactly, was Paris Hilton and why she should have an angel with her. Instead, Dean exhaled and shook his head. "Whatever."
"This is cream," Castiel said as Dean began to walk away.
Dean stopped and turned around. "What?"
"Cream," Castiel said, holding up the blue can of shaving cream. "Cream is something that is normally used in desserts, isn't it? Odd that you would want to shave with it."
"It's a different kind of cream. Not edible."
"But cream is cream. All the same."
Dean sighed. "Do you speak English, man?"
"Yes, I speak English," Castiel answered, tipping his head to the side in that inquisitive manner he had adapted. "Do you not feel that I speak English adequately enough?"
"Well, just..." Dean put his hands on his hips, the handle of the shopping basket hanging off his wrist. Castiel was so much more annoying in a normal environment where they weren't out in old abandoned barns, fighting down demons. Put him in the middle of a store, and he just became a complete pain in the ass. "Look. Shaving cream is not edible. Whipped cream is edible. They're not the same thing. The end."
"I sense that you are growing agitated with me."
"You sense right," Dean said as he walked away. He still needed some groceries for them--he and Sam, who was back in the motel doing research. Hopefully, though, if Dean ventured into the grocery section, Castiel wouldn't end up trying to talk to the vegetables.
"Now, you need to buy food," Castiel said, moving with Dean down the aisles.
"Yup." Dean grabbed a bag of chips and dropped them in the shopping basket. The chips wouldn't last long between Sam and him, but they'd taste good anyway for their brief life.
"You choose unhealthy foods."
"What?"
"These are unhealthy," Castiel said. He had a bag of chips--the one Dean had just chosen--in one hand and a low-fat bag in the other hand. He was glancing back and forth between the nutritional labels. "The bag that you have chosen is higher in fat, calories, and sodium. It seems that the healthier choice would be the other brand."
Dean stared, flabbergasted. "And I care about that why?" he finally managed to sputter.
"Keeping one's body healthy should be a top concern. At least that seems to be what the magazines at the front counter were telling me. I would have assumed you would be following a similar healthy lifestyle."
"Cas?"
"Yes?"
Dean exhaled. His nerves were starting to fray. "Cas," he repeated again, trying to keep his voice level, "in case you haven't noticed, there's the whole 'been to Hell and back' thing I've got going on. And then there's, oh yeah, the apocalypse on our asses? Worrying about how many goddamn calories I'm eating is not exactly on my list of priorities. Not in the top ten. Not in the top hundred. Probably not even in the top one thousand, gottit?"
"So you do not pick your foods by nutritional value?"
Dean's answer was a curse under his breath.
Castiel nodded as if this made perfect sense, and he placed the two bags of chips back on the shelf.
Dean was halfway down the aisle, heading towards the beef jerky when Castiel asked, "Do you have a preference to your foods?"
Dean stopped and turned around. "What?"
"A preference? I am curious to know which foods appeal to you."
"And why's that?"
"I believe I already told you that. I am observing human nature. Food is a very large part of a person's life. I assume it would be for you, as well."
"Y'know, Cas, if you want to go and observe somebody, why don't you go observe Sam, hm? He's always up for some psycho-babble-bullshit and intellectual mumbo-jumbo, all right?"
"But Sam is not here. Sam is back at the motel room where he is working on his computer. I have already observed the both of you in that environment. I want to observe here."
"Well, if you're going to observe, can you at least observe quietly? I'd like to have a moment in my life where you're not breathing down my neck." Dean reached over and dropped a couple bags of jerky into his shopping basket.
"Dean?"
He sighed. "What?"
"Jerky. I know you have accused me before of not understanding the English language, but 'jerky'--and its other forms of ‘jerk’--is a word that has more than one meaning, does it not?"
"Oh God..." Dean groaned.
"Well, yes," Castiel said, "I am sure God would understand the origin of the word 'jerk,' but I feel that bothering Him with such trivial matters is not appropriate."
Dean shook his head and walked away. Stupid angels. Stupid, stupid angels.
End
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 03:41 pm (UTC)"I sense that you are growing agitated with me."
I laughed out loud at this. This is gold :D
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 04:07 pm (UTC)Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it! :D
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 04:28 pm (UTC)BRAIN TWINS! :D
Aw, now all I can think of is Castiel trying peanut butter. *melts*
I LOVE IT :D
Hee! Dean is eating pretzels on your icon! (I ate the most expensive pretzel ever in San Francisco. These things cost next to nothing over here. I never imagined they could be sold as something so special and overpriced O_O)
*is busy interpreting WAY too much in the use of the Welch farm in the pilot episode*
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 04:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 04:41 pm (UTC)Haha, okay, so somebody should write "Meet Joe Black," but with SPN characters, yes? *looks around* Anybody...? Anybody at all?
Yup! :D (Was it from a street vendor? I think sometimes that food can be more expensive than just regular grocery store food. But, I hope it was good for as much as it cost! :) )
Oh? Finding anything interesting?
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 04:42 pm (UTC)Thank you very much! :D
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 05:32 pm (UTC)Bueller?
(Yeah, it was. Still, I don't think I'd have paid $3.5 anywhere in GErmany :D )
Uhm, I hope?
While the concept of a haunted house instead of a Gothic castle might be contemporary, the idea of the building being removed in space and seemingly time to create distance between the “real world” and the world in which everything seems possible, has remained. The Welch farm might not be situated in Italy, but it is a desolate place where normally nobody would venture. Indeed, when asked about her the location of her home the Woman in White answers “At the end of XY road”, implying that the old farm house is the only house at the end of that road, much like Udolpho lies at the end of a road. Both buildings form a final destination. Both places are outside of society, harbouring secrets.
Also, the Welch farm is only shown at night time, presenting it as an even more obscure and haunted place. In both scenes that feature the farm house, the only source of light comes from the headlights of a car. The single source of light that creates an uncanny atmosphere is another typically Gothic element. In these scenes, with the house suddenly coming into view, it almost seems as if the house is coming alive that moment. Even more, when the Woman in White takes her first victim to the house, there is a scene which uses a point of view of someone looking through the windows from inside the house, as if the house might be watching. Like many haunted houses in contemporary Gothic fiction (as in The Haunting of Hill House or The Shining), the Welch farm seems to have an own personality, forming an own character.
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 06:06 pm (UTC)Psst, what's Udolpho, btw? *is curious*
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 06:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 06:25 pm (UTC)"I sense that you are growing agitated with me."
"You sense right,"
My favorite lines. I also love the healthy food section. Ha! I love Castiel.
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 06:26 pm (UTC)Sounds like an icon. Lol.
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 06:42 pm (UTC)Ah, okay. I feel smarter now! ;D
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 06:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 06:44 pm (UTC)Castiel's great. He's quickly becoming my new favorite character. :)
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 07:49 pm (UTC)Castiel has made himself a home right up there with Dean for me. Demonic!Sam has been falling down my list. Maybe now that he's lost some demon blood he'll get a little back to normal for a little while. Who knows.
no subject
Date: 2009-04-29 08:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-30 07:23 am (UTC)Love this. And I'm thinking that Castiel would have a LOT more questions if this were a wincest story. Like, what is that lube for, Dean? :P
no subject
Date: 2009-04-30 02:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-30 02:42 pm (UTC)Me too. :) As for demonic!Sam, I have a feeling that the season finale is going to hit us hard. I haven't read any spoilers, but just with the depth they've been going this season, I've got a feeling we're not done with demonic!Sam yet... :/
no subject
Date: 2009-04-30 02:48 pm (UTC)Castiel: "Condoms? You have chosen the lubricated brand. What are these used for?"
Dean (annoyed): "You wanna know what they're used for? They're used for fu--"
Sam (jumping in, embarrassed): "Fu..fun! FUN. They are used for FUN."
(Dean shoots Sam dirty look. Sam facepalms.)
Haha. Maybe I'll have to do the Wincest version of Dean and Castiel go shopping...
Thank you for reading! :D
no subject
Date: 2009-04-30 02:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-13 09:40 pm (UTC)Brilliant.
no subject
Date: 2009-05-14 10:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-20 07:43 pm (UTC)Very clever! Thanks for sharing.
no subject
Date: 2009-05-21 03:37 pm (UTC)