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PixCT: 04-24
It's that time again...
Fic:
Slash (Dean/Sam)
Adult
~2000 words
- - - - -
A combination of fic, pic, and cock, and that's really all there is to it.
All About Cock Thursday
So Far
September 07
October 07
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PixCT: 4-03
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DruCT: 4-17
PixCT: 4-17
- - - - -
Today
DruCT: 4-24
My fic:
Slash (Wincest: Dean/Sam) oneshot
Adult rating
~2000 words
Major crack. As is, I still don't know where the hell I pulled this from. Just so you're properly warned.
- - - - -
Pix's Pic Pick
It started out innocently enough. Or as innocently as anything involving Dean and too much alcohol can start out.
They were at the bar, feeling pretty damn good for the first time in a long time. Dean's year had been up back in the spring and now it was late summer, and he was still up and yup, still definitely kicking, so they both figured they were in the clear. They'd taken a break from hunting, more or less, and had been spending the last few months lounging around the country.
So, yes, they were at a bar. Dean was drinking something so foul Sam wouldn't have touched it with a ten-foot pole, and Sam had a plain ole Bud to tide him over.
They were laughing about something--Sam's dumbass hair or Dean's fondness for flatulence--when a feminine voice from behind them said, "Excuse me, I need some help."
Snorting back laughter still, they turned around to see an older woman--had to be close to forty, at least, Sam figured--with ratty pigtails and a face full of what looked like acne scars.
"Can you two help me?" she asked, a bit of a slur around her words.
Dean, typical pig, wiped his mouth off on the back of his hand. "What d'ya need?" he asked.
"I've got to find MoonDancer," the woman replied. She scuffed the toe of a Reebok pink laced shoe over the floor.
"MoonDancer?" Sam echoed while Dean mumbled something about a hooker from Miami with a happy glint in his eye.
"Yes, MoonDancer," she said. She pointed to her two-sizes-too-small t-shirt where a white unicorn with purple stars on its hindquarters leapt over a rainbow. "He's the king of My Little Pony Kingdom. I can't find him. They kingdom will fall apart without him!"
Sam didn't know what to say. She was clearly on something. Seriously, he had heard a lot of messed up shit in his life, but a kingdom of My Little Ponies was even a bit too farfetched for him.
But anything he was about to say was lost in Dean's drunken snorts of choked back laughter.
"Kingdom? MoonDancer?" Dean laughed. "Are you snorting something? Jesus," he muttered, turning back to his drink.
The woman paused, caught between tears and shock before she stuck out her lower lip like a pouty two year old and glared at Dean's back.
"You'll be sorry!" she shouted. "I'll make sure you're sorry!" She gave a menacing look to Sam before turning away. Sam watched her push through the people and disappear out the door. He turned his attention back to his beer and thought nothing more of it.
- - - - -
The next morning, after falling asleep face first in the motel bed after one too many drinks, Sam was awakened by Dean shaking his shoulder.
"Sam? Sam, wake up. C'mon, Sammy."
Sam grumbled and went to pull a pillow over his head, but his fingers threaded through something long and silky. Blearily, he opened his eyes to see his fist curled around long blades of lush, green grass. With a jolt, he leapt up, nearly crashing into Dean, and gaped at the world around him.
They were in the middle of a field where flowers as tall as his waist sparkled and glittered. There was a winding road made of silver that twisted and turned over the rolling hills before leading up to what appeared to be--yes--a castle. Butterflies as big as basketballs fluttered over the tops of flowering trees, and if he stopped breathing for the slightest moment to stay quiet, he was able to hear harp music in the distance.
"So," Dean said, scratching the back of his neck, "do you want me to say now or later that I don't think we're in Kansas anymore?"
"Shut up," Sam snapped. "This isn't funny."
Dean shrugged. "Whatever you say, Dorothy."
Sam glared at him and looked out over the rolling hills of sparkling flowers. A fairy swooped over his head, giggling, before fluttering away.
"Think this has anything to do with the girl from the bar last night?" Sam asked.
"It's a possibility. If we see a unicorn, then it turns into a 'hell yeah'."
Sam nodded towards the gleaming castle on the hill. "I'm voting we go there first. Get us the hell out of here."
Dean squinted against the too bright sunlight and licked his lips. "Do I smell cotton candy?"
Rolling his eyes, Sam pushed his way through the flowers and emerged onto the silver road.
"No, seriously, I smell cotton candy!" Dean exclaimed as he followed Sam up to the castle.
- - - - -
On their way to the castle, they encountered friendly My Little Ponies, who smiled at them and called out, "Welcome, strangers!" Occasionally, Dean gave an awkward wave back, but after a few times of this, he pressed his lips close to Sam's ear and whispered, "This is starting to freak me out, man."
As a young pony, not much taller than Dean's waist, with bright pink hair and an orange body ran up to them, Sam replied back, "You and me both."
"Momma!" the orange baby cried. "Look! Humans! We must tell Princess Philomena of the newcomers!"
Before Sam or Dean could say anything further, the baby launched her--it--self in the air and flew off to the castle. A larger orange horse that Sam assumed was the mother followed the baby and left Sam and Dean alone again.
"Princess Philomena?" Dean mused. "Hm, I could like the sound of that."
Sam thought back to the angry woman at the bar last night and said, "I wouldn't get too happy just yet."
- - - - -
Even before they had a chance to knock on the door, two large blue unicorns who were waiting by the door, flanked the brothers and said, "The princess would like to see you now."
Not wanting to argue with unicorns taller than Sam, the brothers both nodded and let the unicorns lead them down pink marbled hallways to a large opened room. In the room, there was a large silver throne chair where the woman from the bar sat, now dressed in flowing pink princess robes adorned with poofy, silk flowers. She smiled as the unicorns led Sam and Dean to her.
"Hello, boys," she said in that same slurred voice. "Welcome to my kingdom." She leaned forward in her chair, clasped her hands beneath her chin and said, "And now I'm going to make you sorry that you didn't decide to help me when you had the chance."
- - - - -
The brothers were separated, each tied to walls on the opposite side of the room, and Sam, if he didn't have one hell of a pissed off looking unicorn with a horn that could slit him from top to bottom beside him, would have found the situation almost funny.
The room was suddenly filled with My Little Ponies holding bundles of those glittering flowers in their mouths. In such an enclosed area, Sam was suddenly acutely aware of the cotton candy smell that Dean had been talking about earlier.
The lady nodded, a signal, and the ponies dropped the flowers and began to stomp them. The flowers, broken, released a golden dust in the air, and Sam watched the dust float, swirling through the room. It landed on his cheeks and skin, and it didn't take long before he felt a warm heat rush through his body. A warm heat that smelled of cotton candy and brought thoughts of things more perverse than cotton candy to his mind.
He swore under his breath and hoped that it wasn't what he thought it was.
Across the room, Dean was straining, and Sam saw the instant the dust hit Dean, when Dean stopped fighting and his eyes glazed over.
"You know what this is?" the princess asked. "It's sex pollen." She snickered, clapped her hands gleefully, so delighted with herself. "It'll kill a man, it's so powerful. It won't harm me or my ponies, but you two? It'll drive you both mad before you die from need."
"But!" she held up a finger. "I want to make this fun. For all of us." She motioned to the unicorns beside Dean. "Release him." The two guard unicorns gave a flick of their horns and the bonds holding Dean were broken, and he tumbled forward.
He glanced over at Sam before turning his attention back to the demented princess. "Fun? Like how, fun?" Dean said, voice pained. His cheeks were flushed, and his cock was a hard line in his jeans. He was fighting for control.
"Like I'll give you a choice to save yourself instead of dying."
"Oh?"
"Yes. I'll let you release the sex pollen's oh-so-nasty effects. I'll give you three choices. You can either have sex with one of my most beautiful ponies," she said, and a rather gorgeous--if one could say a purple horse with silver hair was gorgeous, Sam thought--pony entered the room, "or you could have sex with me."
"What's the third choice?" Dean choked back.
She curled her lip. "Your brother." When Dean didn't reply for a moment, she chuckled. "It's so easy, really. No one in their right mind would choose bestiality or incest. They have to choose me. The safe route. The normal route. I don't know why you have to stand there and think."
Dean didn't say anything for a long while, and Sam held his breath as his head spun. He felt like he was going to burst if he couldn't relieve the rising tension in his body. Weakly, he thrust his hips, trying futilely to find some--any--friction, but the unicorn only gave him a dirty glare and snorted angrily.
"Well?" the princess pressed as she stood up from her throne and began unbuttoning her top. "Are we going to get this started? Or you can just die, y'know."
"Here's the thing," Dean replied, pressing the heel of his hand against his cock. "That horse? Wouldn't do that in a million years. Not putting my equipment in something like that. And you, sweetie? I don't know where the hell you've been. I mean, seriously, you could have crabs. Pubic lice. STDs, something nasty I don't even want to go poking around in. Give me my brother."
The princess gaped as the unicorns undid Sam's bonds, and he staggered across the room to meet Dean.
"You're choosing incest over something normal like me!" she screeched, shocked.
Dean shrugged, smiled as he cupped Sam's face in his hands. "Like I said, you might have bugs and I'm not passing those on to Sam. I'm a one-man man, honey." He grinned and said, "Right, Sammy? Only got eyes for you."
While the princess whined and wailed, Dean pulled Sam to him and kissed him hard and fierce, foreheads bumping and teeth clashing.
"Let's give 'em a show to remember, huh?" Dean hissed.
"You bet'cha," Sam laughed, and they peeled off clothing, pulled off shirts and toed off shoes and undid pants. Their grunts and groans echoed throughout the large room, and some of the ponies turned big, innocent eyes away.
Finally, the princess yelled, "This isn't how it was supposed to happen!" and she stomped her foot angrily. There was a crack, and suddenly, Sam and Dean were falling.
- - - - -
When Sam opened his eyes, he saw they were back in the motel room. They were both naked, lying on the bed, and Dean was on top, staring down at him. The heat of the sex pollen spell had dissipated, and now Sam was only filled with the normal want he felt whenever he was with Dean.
"It's over," Sam said, smiling. "She's gone. We're out."
Dean grinned, eyes crinkling, and said, "Did she really think I was going to choose her or a friggin' horse over you?"
"Most people would have."
"Yeah, well," Dean said, "most people don't have you for a brother."
"Most people don't kiss their brother."
"Aw, fuck that," Dean growled, leaned down and kissed Sam, both laughing, while a little white unicorn with purple stars on its hindquarters watched them from the bedside table.
End
Fic:
- - - - -
A combination of fic, pic, and cock, and that's really all there is to it.
All About Cock Thursday
So Far
- - - - -
Today
Pix's Pic Pick
It started out innocently enough. Or as innocently as anything involving Dean and too much alcohol can start out.
They were at the bar, feeling pretty damn good for the first time in a long time. Dean's year had been up back in the spring and now it was late summer, and he was still up and yup, still definitely kicking, so they both figured they were in the clear. They'd taken a break from hunting, more or less, and had been spending the last few months lounging around the country.
So, yes, they were at a bar. Dean was drinking something so foul Sam wouldn't have touched it with a ten-foot pole, and Sam had a plain ole Bud to tide him over.
They were laughing about something--Sam's dumbass hair or Dean's fondness for flatulence--when a feminine voice from behind them said, "Excuse me, I need some help."
Snorting back laughter still, they turned around to see an older woman--had to be close to forty, at least, Sam figured--with ratty pigtails and a face full of what looked like acne scars.
"Can you two help me?" she asked, a bit of a slur around her words.
Dean, typical pig, wiped his mouth off on the back of his hand. "What d'ya need?" he asked.
"I've got to find MoonDancer," the woman replied. She scuffed the toe of a Reebok pink laced shoe over the floor.
"MoonDancer?" Sam echoed while Dean mumbled something about a hooker from Miami with a happy glint in his eye.
"Yes, MoonDancer," she said. She pointed to her two-sizes-too-small t-shirt where a white unicorn with purple stars on its hindquarters leapt over a rainbow. "He's the king of My Little Pony Kingdom. I can't find him. They kingdom will fall apart without him!"
Sam didn't know what to say. She was clearly on something. Seriously, he had heard a lot of messed up shit in his life, but a kingdom of My Little Ponies was even a bit too farfetched for him.
But anything he was about to say was lost in Dean's drunken snorts of choked back laughter.
"Kingdom? MoonDancer?" Dean laughed. "Are you snorting something? Jesus," he muttered, turning back to his drink.
The woman paused, caught between tears and shock before she stuck out her lower lip like a pouty two year old and glared at Dean's back.
"You'll be sorry!" she shouted. "I'll make sure you're sorry!" She gave a menacing look to Sam before turning away. Sam watched her push through the people and disappear out the door. He turned his attention back to his beer and thought nothing more of it.
The next morning, after falling asleep face first in the motel bed after one too many drinks, Sam was awakened by Dean shaking his shoulder.
"Sam? Sam, wake up. C'mon, Sammy."
Sam grumbled and went to pull a pillow over his head, but his fingers threaded through something long and silky. Blearily, he opened his eyes to see his fist curled around long blades of lush, green grass. With a jolt, he leapt up, nearly crashing into Dean, and gaped at the world around him.
They were in the middle of a field where flowers as tall as his waist sparkled and glittered. There was a winding road made of silver that twisted and turned over the rolling hills before leading up to what appeared to be--yes--a castle. Butterflies as big as basketballs fluttered over the tops of flowering trees, and if he stopped breathing for the slightest moment to stay quiet, he was able to hear harp music in the distance.
"So," Dean said, scratching the back of his neck, "do you want me to say now or later that I don't think we're in Kansas anymore?"
"Shut up," Sam snapped. "This isn't funny."
Dean shrugged. "Whatever you say, Dorothy."
Sam glared at him and looked out over the rolling hills of sparkling flowers. A fairy swooped over his head, giggling, before fluttering away.
"Think this has anything to do with the girl from the bar last night?" Sam asked.
"It's a possibility. If we see a unicorn, then it turns into a 'hell yeah'."
Sam nodded towards the gleaming castle on the hill. "I'm voting we go there first. Get us the hell out of here."
Dean squinted against the too bright sunlight and licked his lips. "Do I smell cotton candy?"
Rolling his eyes, Sam pushed his way through the flowers and emerged onto the silver road.
"No, seriously, I smell cotton candy!" Dean exclaimed as he followed Sam up to the castle.
On their way to the castle, they encountered friendly My Little Ponies, who smiled at them and called out, "Welcome, strangers!" Occasionally, Dean gave an awkward wave back, but after a few times of this, he pressed his lips close to Sam's ear and whispered, "This is starting to freak me out, man."
As a young pony, not much taller than Dean's waist, with bright pink hair and an orange body ran up to them, Sam replied back, "You and me both."
"Momma!" the orange baby cried. "Look! Humans! We must tell Princess Philomena of the newcomers!"
Before Sam or Dean could say anything further, the baby launched her--it--self in the air and flew off to the castle. A larger orange horse that Sam assumed was the mother followed the baby and left Sam and Dean alone again.
"Princess Philomena?" Dean mused. "Hm, I could like the sound of that."
Sam thought back to the angry woman at the bar last night and said, "I wouldn't get too happy just yet."
Even before they had a chance to knock on the door, two large blue unicorns who were waiting by the door, flanked the brothers and said, "The princess would like to see you now."
Not wanting to argue with unicorns taller than Sam, the brothers both nodded and let the unicorns lead them down pink marbled hallways to a large opened room. In the room, there was a large silver throne chair where the woman from the bar sat, now dressed in flowing pink princess robes adorned with poofy, silk flowers. She smiled as the unicorns led Sam and Dean to her.
"Hello, boys," she said in that same slurred voice. "Welcome to my kingdom." She leaned forward in her chair, clasped her hands beneath her chin and said, "And now I'm going to make you sorry that you didn't decide to help me when you had the chance."
The brothers were separated, each tied to walls on the opposite side of the room, and Sam, if he didn't have one hell of a pissed off looking unicorn with a horn that could slit him from top to bottom beside him, would have found the situation almost funny.
The room was suddenly filled with My Little Ponies holding bundles of those glittering flowers in their mouths. In such an enclosed area, Sam was suddenly acutely aware of the cotton candy smell that Dean had been talking about earlier.
The lady nodded, a signal, and the ponies dropped the flowers and began to stomp them. The flowers, broken, released a golden dust in the air, and Sam watched the dust float, swirling through the room. It landed on his cheeks and skin, and it didn't take long before he felt a warm heat rush through his body. A warm heat that smelled of cotton candy and brought thoughts of things more perverse than cotton candy to his mind.
He swore under his breath and hoped that it wasn't what he thought it was.
Across the room, Dean was straining, and Sam saw the instant the dust hit Dean, when Dean stopped fighting and his eyes glazed over.
"You know what this is?" the princess asked. "It's sex pollen." She snickered, clapped her hands gleefully, so delighted with herself. "It'll kill a man, it's so powerful. It won't harm me or my ponies, but you two? It'll drive you both mad before you die from need."
"But!" she held up a finger. "I want to make this fun. For all of us." She motioned to the unicorns beside Dean. "Release him." The two guard unicorns gave a flick of their horns and the bonds holding Dean were broken, and he tumbled forward.
He glanced over at Sam before turning his attention back to the demented princess. "Fun? Like how, fun?" Dean said, voice pained. His cheeks were flushed, and his cock was a hard line in his jeans. He was fighting for control.
"Like I'll give you a choice to save yourself instead of dying."
"Oh?"
"Yes. I'll let you release the sex pollen's oh-so-nasty effects. I'll give you three choices. You can either have sex with one of my most beautiful ponies," she said, and a rather gorgeous--if one could say a purple horse with silver hair was gorgeous, Sam thought--pony entered the room, "or you could have sex with me."
"What's the third choice?" Dean choked back.
She curled her lip. "Your brother." When Dean didn't reply for a moment, she chuckled. "It's so easy, really. No one in their right mind would choose bestiality or incest. They have to choose me. The safe route. The normal route. I don't know why you have to stand there and think."
Dean didn't say anything for a long while, and Sam held his breath as his head spun. He felt like he was going to burst if he couldn't relieve the rising tension in his body. Weakly, he thrust his hips, trying futilely to find some--any--friction, but the unicorn only gave him a dirty glare and snorted angrily.
"Well?" the princess pressed as she stood up from her throne and began unbuttoning her top. "Are we going to get this started? Or you can just die, y'know."
"Here's the thing," Dean replied, pressing the heel of his hand against his cock. "That horse? Wouldn't do that in a million years. Not putting my equipment in something like that. And you, sweetie? I don't know where the hell you've been. I mean, seriously, you could have crabs. Pubic lice. STDs, something nasty I don't even want to go poking around in. Give me my brother."
The princess gaped as the unicorns undid Sam's bonds, and he staggered across the room to meet Dean.
"You're choosing incest over something normal like me!" she screeched, shocked.
Dean shrugged, smiled as he cupped Sam's face in his hands. "Like I said, you might have bugs and I'm not passing those on to Sam. I'm a one-man man, honey." He grinned and said, "Right, Sammy? Only got eyes for you."
While the princess whined and wailed, Dean pulled Sam to him and kissed him hard and fierce, foreheads bumping and teeth clashing.
"Let's give 'em a show to remember, huh?" Dean hissed.
"You bet'cha," Sam laughed, and they peeled off clothing, pulled off shirts and toed off shoes and undid pants. Their grunts and groans echoed throughout the large room, and some of the ponies turned big, innocent eyes away.
Finally, the princess yelled, "This isn't how it was supposed to happen!" and she stomped her foot angrily. There was a crack, and suddenly, Sam and Dean were falling.
When Sam opened his eyes, he saw they were back in the motel room. They were both naked, lying on the bed, and Dean was on top, staring down at him. The heat of the sex pollen spell had dissipated, and now Sam was only filled with the normal want he felt whenever he was with Dean.
"It's over," Sam said, smiling. "She's gone. We're out."
Dean grinned, eyes crinkling, and said, "Did she really think I was going to choose her or a friggin' horse over you?"
"Most people would have."
"Yeah, well," Dean said, "most people don't have you for a brother."
"Most people don't kiss their brother."
"Aw, fuck that," Dean growled, leaned down and kissed Sam, both laughing, while a little white unicorn with purple stars on its hindquarters watched them from the bedside table.
End
no subject
Hee, this made me happy. Esp the ending → Sam was only filled with the normal want he felt whenever he was with Dean., and Dean's kiss → lovely.
♥
no subject
Thank you! :D
♥
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that was hilarious!
for some reason, "No, seriously, I smell cotton candy!" Dean exclaimed that made me snort with laughter, I can so see it in canon.
And the foot stamping fit, when you've got Sam/Dean action to watch? Is she crazy? ;)
no subject
Well, perhaps. Just maybe. ;)
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed! :D
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Thank you! :)
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The room was suddenly filled with My Little Ponies holding bundles of those glittering flowers in their mouths.
I must have woken the dead around there, laughing so hard I almost broke my chair...
Oh, god, this was too good !
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But seriously I LOVe you. I can't stop laughing as I type this. I'm not even coherent right now, alls I know is that you=crack goddess no wait
you=titan greater than gods
no subject
Thank you very much! :D